“Taking Time”
When was the last time you did absolutely nothing or completely unplugged from your world of electronic devices? I recently read an article on NPR.org entitled, “Bored…And Brilliant? A Challenge to Disconnect From Your Phone” by the NPR Staff.
The article confirms what I’ve believed for years. It’s nice to have additional scientific evidence that ‘unplugging’ is a good thing.
Several years ago, I instituted ‘No Electronics Day’ or N.E.D. at home. Our kids had a real fit. It was unfair and unnecessary in their minds. You should have heard all of the ranting, raving, and stomping. However, I didn’t care because I knew it would bring a refreshed perspective and new dynamism to our family. The fact that N.E.D. day was just one day per week (usually Wednesdays) didn’t dissuade our kids' complaining; however, it gave me additional leverage because I could highlight the fact that they had six whole other days to enjoy their electronics!
So, when we started with N.E.D. days it was very jerky at first, and I had to constantly remind our three kids of the rules---no electronics whatsoever, no TV, no video games, no cell phones, nada. You can read, play board games, write, play outside, but absolutely no electronics because it was N.E. D. Day! “OMG” was all we heard in the beginning. It was like the world was ending.
As we settled into our weekly N.E.D. days, of course the entire tempo in the house changed. The kids played more together, talking, laughing and being more in the moment. That awkward silence because everyone was on their electronic devices disappeared. Now, the house was full of gleeful and at times, not so gleeful, chatter. It was so rewarding to see the kids reading, writing stories, engaging with each other, or playing soccer outside.
Of course, as part of this new weekly tradition, the kids thought that N.E.D. day should be for everyone, including Mom and Dad. While I complied because I believed in creating positive shared experiences, their Dad refused and evoked his executive power as a parent to be excluded. This of course didn't go over well with the kids. However, the fact that I was ‘all in’ helped to pacify the situation.
As parents, I believe we have to find creative ways to help our kids ‘unplug’ and to tune in to their own magic and optimize the joy that comes from truly engaging with others. While N.E.D. was one solution for my family, there are so many other options out there for families who’d like to create a different dynamic in their homes. Sure, it might be uncomfortable because there’s so much resistance from the kids, and the complaining and whining can be overwhelming. However, stick to your guns and do what’s best for your family. Your children will benefit tremendously and connect better with each other---whether or not they know it or not. It could take a few years before they fully appreciate this noble parental gesture.
Now, at 21 and 17, our kids always provide cheshire cat smiles whenever we bring up N.E.D days. Perhaps they've haven't come to appreciate our efforts yet. However, I have no doubt that they will some day. So, for all those adults out there with or without children, start your own N.E.D day tradition and watch the peace and creativity flow.